Home > Ames, Bentley vs. Runners-up, Gossip Rags > More Proof that Ames is “Just a Visitor” on our Planet

More Proof that Ames is “Just a Visitor” on our Planet

While our allegiance is to Bentley, we can’t help but like Ames. You could say we have developed an other-worldly fascination with him. Now that he’s a finalist in the Bachelorette, he’s finally starting to get the media attention he craves deserves.

According to the gossip rags: “Although billed on the show as a ‘portfolio manager,’ one of his exes says he never really has real jobs. “He doesn’t really work. He just gets degrees and travels around.”

Sounds pretty good to us. Why is this supposed to be a knock against him? Like the other guys resumes are so great. Would you rather have him cut hair, make appetizers, or sell phones at a kiosk? He’s simply sampling from our planet’s rich intellectual and cultural heritage. Contrary to what this report implies, portfolio management (read: managing your family’s fortune) is a totally legitimate profession for a 30-year old aspiring alien actor. Plus, portfolios can get seriously crazy if you don’t manage them properly.

The article goes on to say that Ames is a “lady killer.” He’s charming, intellectual and good-looking, but he uses those great assets to get whatever he wants from women.”

Ah, yeah, or he uses his synthetic pheromones and wide-eye vision to attract them (which appear to be second only to Bentley’s rustic charm and rugged good-looks at attracting Ashley). He certainly Ames to please in that outfit.

  1. Swedish
    July 9, 2011 at 12:15 am

    hey, lets not be mean here… I mean sure … he looks laughable and like an alien – but does Ashley deserve anything better?
    this is the best Ashley would be able to get out in the real world. lets be honest here, who here has eve got a hard on by watching Ashley, anyone?
    Im 25, and she is what? 26? she looks like a 35-year-old with weird haircuts.

    • July 10, 2011 at 2:33 am

      True. Ames > Ashley (not saying much)

      We are not intending to be mean. We really think he is an alien, the human model for Quasimoto, or Admiral Ackbar.

      We are big fans of Ames

  1. July 13, 2011 at 8:59 pm
  2. July 21, 2011 at 11:51 pm

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